9.28.2006

Some stuff to feel good about

Well,

taking a tip from Vipul i decided to make notes of some good stuff that i manage to do during the course of the day.

Today, the best things i could say i did were:

1. Managed the material required from my side and managed all things i was required to do in my position as the software secy.
2. Managed to retain my focus and win all TT games against equally good oponents.

nothing major but it helps to build confidence

9.27.2006

This is It

Well, i get the 'this is it' feeling.

The conversation with Vipul brought up a need to examine my giuding principles and motives in full earnest. and also a need to examine what i need to change and what to keep.

My actions seem to indicate that i am working for a life of least discomfort more than anything else.
It is fair to say that i am dissatisfied with certain aspects of my current life.

Things i'd like to retain from my Current Ethic:

1. 0 Psychological Dependence on Others.
2. The ability to discriminate between things that matter and socially conditioned realities, i.e. the ability to see what is important than what society deems to be correct or desirable.
3. The emotional stability i currently enjoy, i.e. my emotional state is independent of what happens outside of me and mostly a function of what i do.
4. The ability to examine my own motives. Indeed, that is something i am able to do right now.
5. The no comparison approach. That i have managed to mostly shelve the competitive and comparitive thinking which are de facto in the world today.

Things i want in my life

1. Steadiness in pursuing an objective. Things which i know are correct and should be done. In the past i've tended to not even complete things i felt passionate about at points in time. I find that this is an important dimension i need to add to myself.
2. Fearlessness - I find that i need greater fearlessness and confidence in myself while doing the right things. Wish to totally end the 'chicken out' phenomenon.
3. Love - This is a missing point. This shall be required. The feeling of unity with someone that i haven't felt at all for a long time.
4. Greater Comprehension - I have shied away from the details of life uptil now. I wish to have greater, wider and more accurate comprehension of what happens around me. Explore various viewpoints and worldviews.